Pictures of Nil before & after grooming
It has been a year since Nil was lost to us. Her loss was attributed to carelessness on my part and I will never be able to shake off this feeling of guilt & remorse. Nil would have been 10 this year.
She was christened Nil by virtue of a fluke. My friends did not pick her as a first choice for me from the litter of pups. They gave me her sister instead and named her Easter. That was because Easter joined my family on Good Friday ‘97. Sadly, Easter did not survive very long. She died on the Monday after Easter Sunday - ran over by a car and ironically, I remember that it was on a 1st of April.
My friends pondered over the wisdom of giving me another dog. They finally decided to give Nil to me and took her to the vet for a bath and vaccination. There they were made to fill in a form and under the ‘name’ column, they had filled in ‘Nil’ and so, that’s how Nil got her name. Later, when Nil became a mother, we affectionately called her “Mummy Girl” or “girl” for short.
When Nil first came to us, she resembled a lamb; unsteady on her feet, lanky and skinny with huge terrified eyes. I told myself not to love her too much lest, like Easter, she was taken prematurely from us. Instead, Nil attached herself to us first and because she was so affectionate, it was impossible not to love her. She loved to be hugged and cuddled and did everything she could to catch your attention. She got along with our other dog, Max, and from their union, gave birth to 5 puppies. We gave them all away but held on to one and named him Fai. Nil doted on her son - that’s why Fai is so fat today, - she always reserved the best portion of her food for him. Everyday Nil would lick clean Fai’s ears and fur. Both mother and son shared a plate of milk every morning and while Fai would drink it up at twice the speed, Nil would lap at hers slowly.
Nil was for most times, gentle. She only got involved in fights whenever Fai fought with our 4th dog, Shaggy, and it seemed as if Fai was going to lose. She slept with 2 paws crossed in front of her, just like a lady. One thing Nil hated though was to take a bath. Fai, on the other hand, is so vain that all I need to say is “who wants to be a handsome boy?” and he would happily follow me into the bathroom. Nil would instinctively know that her turn was up next and she would crawl under a table, chair or somewhere hard to reach. Each time I dragged her out of her hiding place, she would lie on her back and play dead, 4 legs in the air, eyes opened wide and unblinking.
Whenever I was upstairs sitting on the floor, reading the papers, Nil would happily settle down on top of it. She would refuse to budge and it became a game for us – for me to remove the papers from underneath her without tearing. She enjoyed eating fish liver oil. All I had to do was rattle the container where the capsules were kept and she’d come running. However, she refused to swallow any until we take a bite first off every capsule and allow the oil to ooze out.
As much as I miss her, I am sure Fai misses her more. Until today he leaves a portion of his food untouched as was his habit while Nil was with us. Like a human child and its mother, the mother is expected to eat all the leftovers from her child’s plate. Likewise, Nil did the same.
It was a sad day for us when she ran off playfully on the way to the vet. We took turns looking for her for many days and finally accepted the fact that she was lost to us for good.
Everyone says that Nil has likely been adopted by a kind and loving family who has come to love her as we did. I know they are only saying that to console us. I only wish there was some way to ascertain this, to have the assurance that she’s doing fine. The greatest burden to bear is, not knowing for a fact. I want to believe with all my heart that she is happy wherever she is. We miss her tremendously but in the midst of our grief, we are grateful for the 9 years she shared with us. Given a choice to adopt her as a puppy knowing what I know now - that she would finally be lost to us, would I do it again? Yes, without hesitation or regret.
Through it all, I have one consolation and that is, my conscience is clear. Whatever my failings as a human being, I have loved Nil as best as I could. And I know Nil in her own way have always felt secured in that knowledge. I wish her well always wherever she is.
Take care, Girl. F
She was christened Nil by virtue of a fluke. My friends did not pick her as a first choice for me from the litter of pups. They gave me her sister instead and named her Easter. That was because Easter joined my family on Good Friday ‘97. Sadly, Easter did not survive very long. She died on the Monday after Easter Sunday - ran over by a car and ironically, I remember that it was on a 1st of April.
My friends pondered over the wisdom of giving me another dog. They finally decided to give Nil to me and took her to the vet for a bath and vaccination. There they were made to fill in a form and under the ‘name’ column, they had filled in ‘Nil’ and so, that’s how Nil got her name. Later, when Nil became a mother, we affectionately called her “Mummy Girl” or “girl” for short.
When Nil first came to us, she resembled a lamb; unsteady on her feet, lanky and skinny with huge terrified eyes. I told myself not to love her too much lest, like Easter, she was taken prematurely from us. Instead, Nil attached herself to us first and because she was so affectionate, it was impossible not to love her. She loved to be hugged and cuddled and did everything she could to catch your attention. She got along with our other dog, Max, and from their union, gave birth to 5 puppies. We gave them all away but held on to one and named him Fai. Nil doted on her son - that’s why Fai is so fat today, - she always reserved the best portion of her food for him. Everyday Nil would lick clean Fai’s ears and fur. Both mother and son shared a plate of milk every morning and while Fai would drink it up at twice the speed, Nil would lap at hers slowly.
Nil was for most times, gentle. She only got involved in fights whenever Fai fought with our 4th dog, Shaggy, and it seemed as if Fai was going to lose. She slept with 2 paws crossed in front of her, just like a lady. One thing Nil hated though was to take a bath. Fai, on the other hand, is so vain that all I need to say is “who wants to be a handsome boy?” and he would happily follow me into the bathroom. Nil would instinctively know that her turn was up next and she would crawl under a table, chair or somewhere hard to reach. Each time I dragged her out of her hiding place, she would lie on her back and play dead, 4 legs in the air, eyes opened wide and unblinking.
Whenever I was upstairs sitting on the floor, reading the papers, Nil would happily settle down on top of it. She would refuse to budge and it became a game for us – for me to remove the papers from underneath her without tearing. She enjoyed eating fish liver oil. All I had to do was rattle the container where the capsules were kept and she’d come running. However, she refused to swallow any until we take a bite first off every capsule and allow the oil to ooze out.
As much as I miss her, I am sure Fai misses her more. Until today he leaves a portion of his food untouched as was his habit while Nil was with us. Like a human child and its mother, the mother is expected to eat all the leftovers from her child’s plate. Likewise, Nil did the same.
It was a sad day for us when she ran off playfully on the way to the vet. We took turns looking for her for many days and finally accepted the fact that she was lost to us for good.
Everyone says that Nil has likely been adopted by a kind and loving family who has come to love her as we did. I know they are only saying that to console us. I only wish there was some way to ascertain this, to have the assurance that she’s doing fine. The greatest burden to bear is, not knowing for a fact. I want to believe with all my heart that she is happy wherever she is. We miss her tremendously but in the midst of our grief, we are grateful for the 9 years she shared with us. Given a choice to adopt her as a puppy knowing what I know now - that she would finally be lost to us, would I do it again? Yes, without hesitation or regret.
Through it all, I have one consolation and that is, my conscience is clear. Whatever my failings as a human being, I have loved Nil as best as I could. And I know Nil in her own way have always felt secured in that knowledge. I wish her well always wherever she is.
Take care, Girl. F
1 comment:
has it been a year??? Seems like a couple of mths ago ..... hope u are in a happy place, Nil!!!
E
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